Simple Thoughts.... Complex Thinking..... In Search For An Answer
~* Sunday, July 31, 2005 *~
Lately i'm been all but +ve..... when i think abt the things i've said.. the way i think... the things i wanna do (all i wanna do is stay at hm)... it just doesn't feel like the "SuperMaddy" me anymore.. I used to have the get up and go mentality.. now is just a.. "Um.. let me think abt it" mindset..
Wat's happening?! Maybe it's the jetlag.. some of my friends tell me.. or the time away from home.. but i've been back for 2 weeks alrdy! for goodness sake!
Well, i feel weathered and a certain type of steorotypical breeze of "You're on Holiday.. you deserve a break b4 starting work" has sweeped over me.. is this the way shld be? Wat happened to making full use of my holiday.. instead of bumping away infront of my well equipped tv with enough channels on cable to keep me entertained for hours on end.. happily contented to just lay back... i shouldn't be complaining but i am...
Yet my heartstrings are being pulled, can't decide yet and still hanging ard to see what's going on... social life is just comfy meeting up with my life dearest pple.. family life is stable with chat with mama & pops.. life is smooth.. too smooth.. so is all this -Ve or +Ve?
We spend most of our time and energy in a kind of horizontal thinking.
We move along the surface of things…[but] there are times when we stop.
We sit sill.
We lose ourselves in a pile of leaves or its memory.
We listen and breezes from a whole other world begin to whisper.
~ James Carroll
~* Saturday, July 30, 2005 *~
Heya pple, i'm back! My bro got his computer up and running.. my lappy still can't be used to go online... but my life has been a bore.. i think my age is catching up on me.. i'm feeling old.. and i have no mood to do anything, i dun enjoy going out anymore.. Ever since i came back from Aussie, i've not be able to adapt back to my Singapore life. The weather gets me down, the idea of public transport makes me weak in my knees, the food is greasy, my funds are running an all time LOW... til today i still haven't got the chance to spent one full day at home.. i've been out every single day! I'm tired.. i just wanna stay home to rest, to play with my wolfy, to relax, to do some important reflection, to eat my nourishing home cooked meals, to spend time with my family, to just go online all day to find out stuff for work, my loans, my CPA... u see! I'm boring you alrdy!
Work has yet to commence but i can feel the depression kicking in.. the stress of financial mgt, the need to make something out of myself.. anything.. the need to provide for the family not just fund my own needs.. the need to start saving for my MBA and CPA program, to make investments, for insurance, Hp bills, for my car.. to buy meals to thank those who have stood beside me for so long, cheering me on! Pple like my family, my godparents, my aunties & uncles...
to be focus on wat i really wanna do.. my career plans for the future.. b'cos if you realized it, it all have to start now! I mean now! You can't expect things to happen if you dun plan for them.. but i mean these are all the very basic minumium.. but it's freeky scary!
Yet I still haven't includes things i "want" to get or i thot so.. like $ to go on holiday, for working wear, cosmestics, entertainment, birthdays gifts, nice dinners with friends... it's ain't happening for me... i'm not planning for big ticket items like LV, or super branded stuff.. i mean these are essentials for any gal.. but these little things do add to alot... and it's definitely been stressing me out.. and esp now when i have no income as i'm waiting for work to start in Sept, just came back from my exp Aussie trip.. it only fair that i dun overspent b4 i start work..
Just got the news today that I won't be moving anymore cos of some stupid gal person who has been holding things up for the housing developer and the co. now reject our appeal for an extension of the date as it is already long over due for us to actually move... anyway long story..
Today, been to JB with my parents for makan and some grocery shopping bumped into Adrian(the old one from the 1st batch of smu biz) and his gf at lunch, of all places! I mean i was in JB! haha.. then reach home totally shagged and tired to go out anymore... plus headache.. give me 1 day to rest k... it's even a full day... cos last nite up all nite cos had a stayover at my place.. it was great! It's like our final 'bonding' session b4 we all go off to start our routine working life..
Now just a topic discussion b4 i call it a day and go snoooze... "Some pple u get over but never 4get":
There are some pple in our life that we will never forget no matter how hard we try
They are the ones who really change ur life thru ways they never thot possible...
Cos they bring you ur most highest euphoria or seen ur worst..
Work has yet to commence but i can feel the depression kicking in.. the stress of financial mgt, the need to make something out of myself.. anything.. the need to provide for the family not just fund my own needs.. the need to start saving for my MBA and CPA program, to make investments, for insurance, Hp bills, for my car.. to buy meals to thank those who have stood beside me for so long, cheering me on! Pple like my family, my godparents, my aunties & uncles...
to be focus on wat i really wanna do.. my career plans for the future.. b'cos if you realized it, it all have to start now! I mean now! You can't expect things to happen if you dun plan for them.. but i mean these are all the very basic minumium.. but it's freeky scary!
Yet I still haven't includes things i "want" to get or i thot so.. like $ to go on holiday, for working wear, cosmestics, entertainment, birthdays gifts, nice dinners with friends... it's ain't happening for me... i'm not planning for big ticket items like LV, or super branded stuff.. i mean these are essentials for any gal.. but these little things do add to alot... and it's definitely been stressing me out.. and esp now when i have no income as i'm waiting for work to start in Sept, just came back from my exp Aussie trip.. it only fair that i dun overspent b4 i start work..
Just got the news today that I won't be moving anymore cos of some stupid gal person who has been holding things up for the housing developer and the co. now reject our appeal for an extension of the date as it is already long over due for us to actually move... anyway long story..
Today, been to JB with my parents for makan and some grocery shopping bumped into Adrian(the old one from the 1st batch of smu biz) and his gf at lunch, of all places! I mean i was in JB! haha.. then reach home totally shagged and tired to go out anymore... plus headache.. give me 1 day to rest k... it's even a full day... cos last nite up all nite cos had a stayover at my place.. it was great! It's like our final 'bonding' session b4 we all go off to start our routine working life..
Now just a topic discussion b4 i call it a day and go snoooze... "Some pple u get over but never 4get":
There are some pple in our life that we will never forget no matter how hard we try
They are the ones who really change ur life thru ways they never thot possible...
Cos they bring you ur most highest euphoria or seen ur worst..
I've been thinking abt some1 that i can't forget... dropped him a note and glad to hear that he is doing well..
Some1 i can't call everyday... but crosses my mind at the now & then..
But i'm glad to have that some1 that i can't forget cos at least i knew someone b4..
It doesn't matters if he doesn't know it cos i'm doing this for me.. cos i know i'm happy just to know some things of that some1 that i knew b4..
It's really strange how things turn out but i have no regrets cos things happen for a reason and i know mine quite well...
Cos some small things really dun matter except the "Big picture"...
No regrets, good lessons learnt and memories for the walk down memory lane..
"this is for those who have been a "some1" in my life b4".. Have a great weekend! :D
Some1 i can't call everyday... but crosses my mind at the now & then..
But i'm glad to have that some1 that i can't forget cos at least i knew someone b4..
It doesn't matters if he doesn't know it cos i'm doing this for me.. cos i know i'm happy just to know some things of that some1 that i knew b4..
It's really strange how things turn out but i have no regrets cos things happen for a reason and i know mine quite well...
Cos some small things really dun matter except the "Big picture"...
No regrets, good lessons learnt and memories for the walk down memory lane..
"this is for those who have been a "some1" in my life b4".. Have a great weekend! :D
~* Thursday, July 28, 2005 *~
Since i got back things have been really busy.. i've now a fresh grad waiting for work to commence in sept... just uploaded my pics.. you can check it out at this link:
http://photobucket.com/albums/y195/maddy82sg/SMU%20Commencement%20Day/
I'm really happy.. it's like one of my happiest day since it's like achieving part one of my dream... then this week has been catching up with my friends.. yep got loads to update u pple!! ;)
How am i gonna to spend the rest of my holidays.. well here are somethings on my list:
http://photobucket.com/albums/y195/maddy82sg/SMU%20Commencement%20Day/
I'm really happy.. it's like one of my happiest day since it's like achieving part one of my dream... then this week has been catching up with my friends.. yep got loads to update u pple!! ;)
How am i gonna to spend the rest of my holidays.. well here are somethings on my list:
- Get more involve with Church.. just got invited to join core grp! :D
- Do some meaningful community work.. Weiyang need some help at his internship at this youth church community place...
- Get more exercise.. need to lose the 2/3kg i put on during my holiday
- Sleep more.. dun think i would be getting enough when i start work
- Spend more time at home with my family... sometimes i do neglect them, this have to change
- Check out my financial planning when i start work.. insurance, loan repayment, savings, credit cards, debit cards
- Just lazing ard.. i love that...
- Playing with wolfy.... wonder if my not being ard for 3 weeks had any impact on him
- Pack my roomy.. it's um... not as neat as i want it to be
So far this is wat i can come up with.. but that's alot alrdy! Well, some things i learnt during my trip in aussie when i visited Hillsong..
- We can never be God and God needs us.. we are his hands, mouth, feet..
- We are God's little princesses and not prima donnas.. let's not be self-centred and change that
- Use wat God has given us to give him glory.. our talents, our strenghts, our time.. God can use us in great ways
- Some lesson Pastor Brian Houston learnt while he was snowboarding that we can apply:
- There is a timing for everything.. if u miss the timing to get off the ski lift, u might fall flat on ur face.
- Look at where you wanna go... if you get on ur snowboard and look at a dustbin infront of you, you will crush into it... dun look at it if u dun wanna head straight for it.
- Don't let fear stop you in your tracks... sometimes it is just trying to get up when u are on thin ice then after that you will be fine.. if u just stay there.. you will fall off the edge.
- Dun only look at things from your angle... when going down the slope slowing in circles, you might think u are looking cool.. but hey.. wat hey other pple see is diff..
These are all from memory.. as i only attended 4 services when i was over there... hope to share it with the rest of you...
This is an update special for my brothers in Christ only, i know many of you are struggling with your sexuality.. it is very real.. so this link might help give you some answers, encouragement that you are not alone.. so put it to good use.. this is set up by one of the pastors at hillsong.. i hope this helps you in one way or another.. http://www.whyterabbit.com/
I'm really tired, this is really late for me.. haven't slept so late in such a long while.. so gotta go to bed! Good nitezy and sweet dreams.. seeya!
~* Tuesday, July 26, 2005 *~
That's refering to my internet.. now at my friend's place trying desperately to install the driver etc for me to use my broadband at home.. I'm a computer idiot, still can't get it.. so hope that my dearest bro will help me SOON...
My life is such a bore without internet when i'm at home.. now all i'm left is with my TV thank goodness i've still got cable.. so been catching up with home movies on the HBO & Star Movies..
Can't really write a long blog cos got all the online stuff to do.. pics that i still have to send out to u pple.. so hang in there.. now off to check my mail & all...
Got some annoying phone calls tonite from somebody i refuse to talk to, what's his problem.. Get a life! Urgh!..
Okie pple til my internet is up and running.. my blog is not going to be very entertaining and yes.. no online time to do my reflections...
My life is such a bore without internet when i'm at home.. now all i'm left is with my TV thank goodness i've still got cable.. so been catching up with home movies on the HBO & Star Movies..
Can't really write a long blog cos got all the online stuff to do.. pics that i still have to send out to u pple.. so hang in there.. now off to check my mail & all...
Got some annoying phone calls tonite from somebody i refuse to talk to, what's his problem.. Get a life! Urgh!..
Okie pple til my internet is up and running.. my blog is not going to be very entertaining and yes.. no online time to do my reflections...
~* Thursday, July 21, 2005 *~
Today have been great! I'm so happy... with my family there.. with all my friends! Most of my dearest friends who i hold really close to my heart.. I love u all.. u hear me!
It's been the most incredible amazing day of this year.. My Commencement Day at smu... I'm exhausted from all the smiling and taking of pics... came home rather late then sat and talked with my mom b4 she went to bed.. then took a while to upload the pics... looking thru them again.. bringing back many fond memories, of how we made it thru sch together.. of how time just flies by.. it's a walk back down memory lane.. too tired to do much thinking... of anything too profound.. congrats to all of you who graduated along with me.. it's been an amazing journey that we have all shared.. and yes i've made it! I've satisfied with where I am and I'm confident of where i'm heading.. This is life and God is good! :D
It's been the most incredible amazing day of this year.. My Commencement Day at smu... I'm exhausted from all the smiling and taking of pics... came home rather late then sat and talked with my mom b4 she went to bed.. then took a while to upload the pics... looking thru them again.. bringing back many fond memories, of how we made it thru sch together.. of how time just flies by.. it's a walk back down memory lane.. too tired to do much thinking... of anything too profound.. congrats to all of you who graduated along with me.. it's been an amazing journey that we have all shared.. and yes i've made it! I've satisfied with where I am and I'm confident of where i'm heading.. This is life and God is good! :D
I've Graduated.. me & my folks.. all so smartly dressed for the occasion!
And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels
[1] - As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever
So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
[Repeat 1]
La, la, la, la:
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la:
We will still be friends forever
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
[Repeat 1 (3x)]
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon
And there was me and you
And then we got real blue
Stay at home talking on the telephone
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at ourselves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels
[1] - As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come Whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever
So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
[Repeat 1]
La, la, la, la:
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la:
We will still be friends forever
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
[Repeat 1 (3x)]
~* Wednesday, July 20, 2005 *~
My Big Day has finally arrived... wah i wonder how it will be like... u know like u worked so hard for 4 year for this day when u get ur scroll and wear ur square hat.. too bad some pple i wish to be here are no longer ard anymore.. like lost contact, some are no longer friends, some are exes..
The nite b4 my graduation.. i'm still jetlag.. yet not sleeping yet cos up doing some of my dad's stuff and just got hm late from our graduation celebration with my SMU pals...
I'm happy with wat i have achieved.. that's with God's grace in my Life.. I wanna thank God bringing me this far.. My parents for supporting me all the way.. & Friends who have always been with me all the way..
Since secondary sch i have always like accounting and i continued to pursue it in JC and now in Uni.. I wanted to be in the accounting line and yes i've made it! Yet at the same time i have had a filfulling happening Uni life! then for my graduation trip i have a 3 week long visit to Aussie Land... I feel so blessed! I'm glad that things went on smoothly despite the many hiccups i faced in my life.. this is a day of commemoration for me and something i can share with my whole family.. wished i had more tix to invite more friends and my God parents along.. but too bad i only have 3 tix...
At SMU, we dun call it graduation but commencement ceremony.. as it is not the end but the beginning of another journey into the working work, and learning is a neverending journey.. Next step would be my CPA or CA and then a Masters.. A degree in our generation is just a base for getting a good job, we have to constantly upgrade ourselves.. to build up our resume of many job experience and paper qualification.. but is this really wat's life abt? For me, I'm just going to enjoy the journey and intend to do the best i can..
Just when you think you've graduated from the school of experience, someone thinks up a new course. - Mary H. Waldrip
Cheers for Graduation.. Tomorrow is our Big Day!
~* Tuesday, July 19, 2005 *~
I'm home and been doing some posting of some pics for ur viewing.. Jet lagged after a 7 hr flight but then yet just wanna absorb the atmostphere of being hm... of hanging out in my room, with wolfy.. coming online.. watching TV! There is no place like home... Arrhh...
Hillsong @ the City.. it's Awesome!!
Pancakes On the Rocks at The Rocks...
This is wat u call a Blue Skie.. in Sydney City
The gals
The Parliament
Reids Lookout at Gramphians
My Travel Groupies
The Ride...
Darling Habour.. while eating Oysters, Sashimi, Fish & Chips, Calamari, Fresh Prawns etc..
Fresh Oysters at Sydney Market.. Succullent!
At the Twelve Apostles...
~* Sunday, July 17, 2005 *~
Time just flies by so fast.. today is my last day here.. tomorrow afternoon i'll be making my way back to S'pore shores... I really dread it.. I can't bear to leave this lovely place.. where i wake up eat day to see new sights.. of beautiful sandy beaches.. of being disconnected from the world where i'm not bothered abt my hp, my emails, my msn, my work.. in a world of my own...
Here i get to:
1) go for Hillsong
2) eat chocolates & ice-cream everyday(they taste better!)
3) get chaffuered ard
4) see clear blue skies
5) many long sandy beaches with 10 mins drive
6) laze ard & idle my time away
7) visit new places & meet new pple
8) have excuese for not working out
9) cold weather.. i won't sweat
10) I dun have to watch the clock
These are my top ten list... but it's the holiday mood.. i'm feeling so carefree and happy.. I love to travel!
Yesterday, i went to this great place called Watson's Bay for fish & chips.. eating by the sea, with boats, sails, sea gulls accompaning me have my lunch.. the weather's just perfect! Then off to Double Bay for Riveria's ice-cream... on a bright sunny saturday.. Life's great!
While ii'm enjoying myself my mind start to clutter itself with things i have to get done b4 i go hm.. like getting things for my family & friends.. my lack of cash.. the coming graduation ceremony i have to prepare for.. the packing & unpacking of my luggage.. the need to get back on track with the fast pace of life back hm.. to prepare for work.. to help my dad with his typing.. to go for my doctor's appointment... this is just the beginning... wished i would just block it all off but it's back to haunt me!
I dun wanna go home... I wanna stay here.. where i'm so comfortable.. where everyday is just a holiday where time just stops...
A good holiday is one spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than yours. - John Boynton Priestley
Here i get to:
1) go for Hillsong
2) eat chocolates & ice-cream everyday(they taste better!)
3) get chaffuered ard
4) see clear blue skies
5) many long sandy beaches with 10 mins drive
6) laze ard & idle my time away
7) visit new places & meet new pple
8) have excuese for not working out
9) cold weather.. i won't sweat
10) I dun have to watch the clock
These are my top ten list... but it's the holiday mood.. i'm feeling so carefree and happy.. I love to travel!
Yesterday, i went to this great place called Watson's Bay for fish & chips.. eating by the sea, with boats, sails, sea gulls accompaning me have my lunch.. the weather's just perfect! Then off to Double Bay for Riveria's ice-cream... on a bright sunny saturday.. Life's great!
While ii'm enjoying myself my mind start to clutter itself with things i have to get done b4 i go hm.. like getting things for my family & friends.. my lack of cash.. the coming graduation ceremony i have to prepare for.. the packing & unpacking of my luggage.. the need to get back on track with the fast pace of life back hm.. to prepare for work.. to help my dad with his typing.. to go for my doctor's appointment... this is just the beginning... wished i would just block it all off but it's back to haunt me!
I dun wanna go home... I wanna stay here.. where i'm so comfortable.. where everyday is just a holiday where time just stops...
A good holiday is one spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than yours. - John Boynton Priestley
~* Friday, July 15, 2005 *~
Hey pple! I'm now back in Sydney! The ocean is blue but been cloudy these few days.. damn cold! Average abt 15 degree celsius... i'm not made for the cold weather... it's freezing :(
These past week has been travelling alot.. got to drive ard Aussie abit.. not good on Daniel's car though.. he got a high clutch.. so totally not used to it.. so give up in the end..
It's really relaxing.. everything seems to move at a slower pace here.. unlike s'pore.. the sky here is also so blue and clear... it's beautiful.. things just looks alot nicer while u are on holiday.. I got my first hand at skiing! it's a breeze.. looks like my blading skills came in handy... haha.. i really enjoyed it.. tomorrowing going ice-skating.. woo hoo!! The scenery here, the beaches, the mountains i trekked up are incredible.. it feels great being ard nature once again.. too much city life in S'pore... But i miss home, my friends, wolfy & the s'pore food!!
Can't blog so much cos i gotta go out soon.. then at nite reach hm i'll be really tired so it's off to bed.. will upload my pics and do more blogging when i get back yeah!
~* Sunday, July 03, 2005 *~
Hey all..
I'm off to melbourne for the next few days without any internet access... I'm doing great.. lots of good food, shopping & been meeting new terrific people.. wow! Best holiday ever!!
Here are my plans for the next few days...
Day 1 (3/7/05)
- 0500hrs leave Tings house for Mt Buller--Staying at YHA Hostel (
$55 a night )
Day 2 (4/7/05)
- Skii whole day and rest and stay in Mt Buller and enjoy the night
scenery around the area. I thought of driving to melbourne straight
after skiing , but it would be kinda rush and tiring for all of
us...so no point...enjoy the holiday, dun rush too much..
URL for the Mt Buller Hostel
**http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?HostelID=101---238km to
Melbourne Hostel
Day 3 (5/7/05)
- Drive to Melbourne -- can pass by Yarra Valley for fun along the
way...and tour the city for dinner...and relax..staying at YHA
also...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=99..Trying
to get 5 person room accomodation..( $26 a night)
Day 4 (6/7/05)
-- Drive to Port Campbell--thru Great Ocean Rd--Very Scenic
Route...Pray for good weather...so we can take heaps of photos. Will
be staying at
YHA...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=103
( $20 night )
Day 5 - (7/7/05)
Drive to Grampians...Hike in the area and stay there for the
night...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=93 ( $23 a
night ) 241km from port campbell
Day 6 (8/7/05)
-Tour Grampians till 3 pm..head back to melborne...YHA hostel
Day 7- (9/7/05)
Head Back to Sydney.
So.. I'll be back.. Ta ta!
I'm off to melbourne for the next few days without any internet access... I'm doing great.. lots of good food, shopping & been meeting new terrific people.. wow! Best holiday ever!!
Here are my plans for the next few days...
Day 1 (3/7/05)
- 0500hrs leave Tings house for Mt Buller--Staying at YHA Hostel (
$55 a night )
Day 2 (4/7/05)
- Skii whole day and rest and stay in Mt Buller and enjoy the night
scenery around the area. I thought of driving to melbourne straight
after skiing , but it would be kinda rush and tiring for all of
us...so no point...enjoy the holiday, dun rush too much..
URL for the Mt Buller Hostel
**http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?HostelID=101---238km to
Melbourne Hostel
Day 3 (5/7/05)
- Drive to Melbourne -- can pass by Yarra Valley for fun along the
way...and tour the city for dinner...and relax..staying at YHA
also...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=99..Trying
to get 5 person room accomodation..( $26 a night)
Day 4 (6/7/05)
-- Drive to Port Campbell--thru Great Ocean Rd--Very Scenic
Route...Pray for good weather...so we can take heaps of photos. Will
be staying at
YHA...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=103
( $20 night )
Day 5 - (7/7/05)
Drive to Grampians...Hike in the area and stay there for the
night...http://www.yha.com.au/hostels/details.cfm?hostelid=93 ( $23 a
night ) 241km from port campbell
Day 6 (8/7/05)
-Tour Grampians till 3 pm..head back to melborne...YHA hostel
Day 7- (9/7/05)
Head Back to Sydney.
So.. I'll be back.. Ta ta!
~* Friday, July 01, 2005 *~
It's so cold.. We took a step outside to get our Domino's Pizza Dinner.. You can feel the damn cold of the nite.. it's drizzling, the wind was blowing.. you can see the trees swaying.. It feels like that at times.. My soul deprived, my spirit wounded with thots of my past.. it's seems like there are decisions that I have to make.. & I've also realized that there are baggages that have been left hanging and I've yet to deal with.. but then again.. how do u exactly deal with such?!
I bumped into some1 unexpectedly the other day.. the scene replayed again & again in my head. It wasn't how i picture it to be like.. i'm sadden by the way things turned out so far. I wanted a friendship but you said it was a lie.. damn it.. excuses.. you promised but you lied. I'm throughly disappointed to this day.. there! I can finally let it out. I dun need this.. I have finally decided to delete you from my life... because you have no regard for me anyway.. I have no thots of rekindling anything or any sort.. Yet you offered ur polite "friend from a distance".. Well, " No thank you".. I dun need you.. I dun need this.. You change my stereotypical assumption i had that it wasn't possible, then i said i was ready then what do i get?! it's unfair.. I dun know why I'm even bothered abt this but yeah it's been bottling up inside.. I just have to let it out.. so that i can erase all trace of ur existence.. b'cos you're a disappointment. Thanks for the lesson learnt. Thanks.
Like the movie.. i pull myself back in time.. slowly erasing all that needs to be deleted.. it's mainly psychological.. it's no longer painful.. just a process that i think i need to go thru.. I now believe you can do whatever your mind tells you to do.. i'm no longer the feely touchy gal i use to be.. "Mind over Matter" will get the better of me.. Now i stand totally guarded and that's how i'm gonna to be..
I bumped into some1 unexpectedly the other day.. the scene replayed again & again in my head. It wasn't how i picture it to be like.. i'm sadden by the way things turned out so far. I wanted a friendship but you said it was a lie.. damn it.. excuses.. you promised but you lied. I'm throughly disappointed to this day.. there! I can finally let it out. I dun need this.. I have finally decided to delete you from my life... because you have no regard for me anyway.. I have no thots of rekindling anything or any sort.. Yet you offered ur polite "friend from a distance".. Well, " No thank you".. I dun need you.. I dun need this.. You change my stereotypical assumption i had that it wasn't possible, then i said i was ready then what do i get?! it's unfair.. I dun know why I'm even bothered abt this but yeah it's been bottling up inside.. I just have to let it out.. so that i can erase all trace of ur existence.. b'cos you're a disappointment. Thanks for the lesson learnt. Thanks.
Like the movie.. i pull myself back in time.. slowly erasing all that needs to be deleted.. it's mainly psychological.. it's no longer painful.. just a process that i think i need to go thru.. I now believe you can do whatever your mind tells you to do.. i'm no longer the feely touchy gal i use to be.. "Mind over Matter" will get the better of me.. Now i stand totally guarded and that's how i'm gonna to be..
Today is a wet day hence staying in cos it's been raining all day long and it's freezing out there with really strong winds blowing! Last fews days I went shopping at their suburban malls and walk ard the area.. I love walking ard the small shop houses here.. it's not anything like singapore.... it's got the small town feel, the shops here all close at 5pm.. so everything is really laid back.. everybody walk at a relax pace.. it's just "chill"...
D's friends here are all really friendly and sweet.. Jac have been bringing me ard shopping.. so far I meet Robert, Cat as well.. the rest of them are still having exams everyboy is super busy.. so bad timing.. but no choice when i bought my ticket the exam timetable wasn't out yet! Oh gosh.. did u know that u need a visa to come to Australia.. I had no idea! I thot only when u go to those communist type of countries like China, Vietname etc then u need it. So i happily went to the airport without getting any.. only at the check-in counter then the person say i need a visa.. my face turned white! Damn!! how come i didn't know?!?! But thank God, you can now apply it online.. so i got mine on the spot.. wat a relief!
Hillsong conference is on next weekend but i'm going to miss it unfortunately as we'll be driving down to melbourne & going to snowy mountains for skiiing! Can't wait! I'm going for Hillsong Women this friday.. wonder wat it'll be like... but i'm going to "The City" instead of "The Hills"..
These past few days I've been eating lots of chocolates.. drinking fruit teas.. & ice-cream... hee hee.. but other than shopping i never do anything much.. then at nite the neighbourhood here is dimly lited and heard that lots of robbery going on ard here.. I'm living at Kingsford.. next to University of New South Wales.. so can't wonder ard at nite too.. not used to it! I miss my hanging out late at nite, the nite life, the late nite supper.. i miss my car.. haven't got the chance to drive ard yet, hope that i can at least give it a go.. that's all for now pple! Maddy signing off.. chilling down under in Sydney! :D
D's friends here are all really friendly and sweet.. Jac have been bringing me ard shopping.. so far I meet Robert, Cat as well.. the rest of them are still having exams everyboy is super busy.. so bad timing.. but no choice when i bought my ticket the exam timetable wasn't out yet! Oh gosh.. did u know that u need a visa to come to Australia.. I had no idea! I thot only when u go to those communist type of countries like China, Vietname etc then u need it. So i happily went to the airport without getting any.. only at the check-in counter then the person say i need a visa.. my face turned white! Damn!! how come i didn't know?!?! But thank God, you can now apply it online.. so i got mine on the spot.. wat a relief!
Hillsong conference is on next weekend but i'm going to miss it unfortunately as we'll be driving down to melbourne & going to snowy mountains for skiiing! Can't wait! I'm going for Hillsong Women this friday.. wonder wat it'll be like... but i'm going to "The City" instead of "The Hills"..
These past few days I've been eating lots of chocolates.. drinking fruit teas.. & ice-cream... hee hee.. but other than shopping i never do anything much.. then at nite the neighbourhood here is dimly lited and heard that lots of robbery going on ard here.. I'm living at Kingsford.. next to University of New South Wales.. so can't wonder ard at nite too.. not used to it! I miss my hanging out late at nite, the nite life, the late nite supper.. i miss my car.. haven't got the chance to drive ard yet, hope that i can at least give it a go.. that's all for now pple! Maddy signing off.. chilling down under in Sydney! :D
