Simple Thoughts.... Complex Thinking..... In Search For An Answer
~* Saturday, December 31, 2005 *~
Time flies with another year gone by... looking back this year was pretty good... with a love found and lost.. I still miss him now and then.. with graduation from Uni.. going on holidays, visiting new places and cultures... Starting my career... a blossoming new love life still in the hanging...
I wonder how this coming year will turn out.. i'm excited to find out.. I seem to have lose my spark somehow these past months.. i wonder if it's cos of work or something esle... so i sat down today and so some refection.
Actually i know the answer but i think it's too personal to blog.. only meant to share with close friends... cos even if i did.. you'll probably not understand... the stupid things i do/think/feel...
New Year Resolutions:
- Get my priorities right.. God First..
- Get job feedback above average.. To excel not just perform on the job..
- Commitment to my believes.. live for it... no matter wat
- Broaden my social circle
- Get a serious workout at least once a week + healthy food
- Travel to at least 3 places
- To let go, forget and start over...
- Lose the emotionality... use more analytical aspect in doing things
so much for today.. now to let lose... put my hair now and party to asher in the New Year!
I've come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy. - Anthony Robbins
I wonder how this coming year will turn out.. i'm excited to find out.. I seem to have lose my spark somehow these past months.. i wonder if it's cos of work or something esle... so i sat down today and so some refection.
Actually i know the answer but i think it's too personal to blog.. only meant to share with close friends... cos even if i did.. you'll probably not understand... the stupid things i do/think/feel...
New Year Resolutions:
- Get my priorities right.. God First..
- Get job feedback above average.. To excel not just perform on the job..
- Commitment to my believes.. live for it... no matter wat
- Broaden my social circle
- Get a serious workout at least once a week + healthy food
- Travel to at least 3 places
- To let go, forget and start over...
- Lose the emotionality... use more analytical aspect in doing things
so much for today.. now to let lose... put my hair now and party to asher in the New Year!
I've come to believe that all my past failure and frustration were actually laying the foundation for the understandings that have created the new level of living I now enjoy. - Anthony Robbins
~* Tuesday, December 27, 2005 *~
Meet up with my Fave friends.. We're just got so much to tell each other.. that we talked non-stop but still got so much more to say.. lucky we update each other on our blogs! :D
Gathering for a group shot.. outside subway.. meeting up for a quick and cosy get together...
~* Monday, December 26, 2005 *~
One day, one friend asked another,
"How is it that you are always so happy?
You have so much energy,
and you never seem to get down."
With her eyes smiling, she said,
"I know the Secret!"
"What secret is that?"
To which she replied,
"I'll tell you all about it,
but you have to promise to
share the Secret with others."
"The Secret is this:
I have learned there is little I can do
in my life that will make me truly happy.
I must depend on God to make
me happy and to meet my needs.
When a need arises in my life,
I have to trust God to supply
according to HIS riches.
I have learned most of the time
I don't need half of what I think I do.
He has never let me down.
Since I learned that 'Secret', I am happy."
The questioner's first thought was,
"That's too simple!"
But upon reflecting over her own life
she recalled how she thought a bigger house
would make her happy, but it didn't!
She thought a better paying job
would make her happy, but it hadn't.
When did she realize her greatest happiness?
Sitting on the floor with her grandchildren,
playing games, eating pizza or reading a story,
a simple gift from God.
Now you know it too!
We can't depend on people to make us happy.
Only GOD in His infinite wisdom can do that.
Trust HIM!
"How is it that you are always so happy?
You have so much energy,
and you never seem to get down."
With her eyes smiling, she said,
"I know the Secret!"
"What secret is that?"
To which she replied,
"I'll tell you all about it,
but you have to promise to
share the Secret with others."
"The Secret is this:
I have learned there is little I can do
in my life that will make me truly happy.
I must depend on God to make
me happy and to meet my needs.
When a need arises in my life,
I have to trust God to supply
according to HIS riches.
I have learned most of the time
I don't need half of what I think I do.
He has never let me down.
Since I learned that 'Secret', I am happy."
The questioner's first thought was,
"That's too simple!"
But upon reflecting over her own life
she recalled how she thought a bigger house
would make her happy, but it didn't!
She thought a better paying job
would make her happy, but it hadn't.
When did she realize her greatest happiness?
Sitting on the floor with her grandchildren,
playing games, eating pizza or reading a story,
a simple gift from God.
Now you know it too!
We can't depend on people to make us happy.
Only GOD in His infinite wisdom can do that.
Trust HIM!
It's been a really long while since i've done some self reflection... I realized that my fuse is getting shorter and shorter.. I don't feel like i'm performing much either on my job.. my love life ain't great.... pple i care abt seem to be busy, drifting away, some just don't even know i care...
On the brighter side, I've been holiday.. alot of new items.. i speak more of my mind.. i'm learning alot of new things.. spending more time with my family... spending less unneccessary money...
There seems to be so much to be done.. that i don't even know where to start... my to do list is just expanding.. i'm not talking abt work mind you... just abt the things i wanna do in my life and how i would like to live... wat is the purpose of my life?
As a Christain i probably already know the answer.. but walking the talk is much more difficult and complex... with many sacrifices.. strength... grace... many beyond me now.. I can only rely on God... however that in itself is a big struggle... who am I really? i feel like i'm at one place at so many times, that i can never concentrate or focus.. I pray for my soul... like how i pray for yours.. so that maybe we can shed our own skin... cos mostly, it's not who we really are, inside.. a front that we have to put up for watever reasons...
Coming Out From Within
I glare into the eyes that reaches deep into the soul, with a sense of emptiness as though
They carry a truth that can't be told, as others shun spiritual depthness ever so.
The world is filled with shallow praise, of fun and laughter with pretense.
I hope not that the end be near, if so, we'll all perish with fear.
I challenge self to be crystal clear, so that my compassion can pierce me to tears.
I desire to be the one full of love, so that i can conquer the world.
On the brighter side, I've been holiday.. alot of new items.. i speak more of my mind.. i'm learning alot of new things.. spending more time with my family... spending less unneccessary money...
There seems to be so much to be done.. that i don't even know where to start... my to do list is just expanding.. i'm not talking abt work mind you... just abt the things i wanna do in my life and how i would like to live... wat is the purpose of my life?
As a Christain i probably already know the answer.. but walking the talk is much more difficult and complex... with many sacrifices.. strength... grace... many beyond me now.. I can only rely on God... however that in itself is a big struggle... who am I really? i feel like i'm at one place at so many times, that i can never concentrate or focus.. I pray for my soul... like how i pray for yours.. so that maybe we can shed our own skin... cos mostly, it's not who we really are, inside.. a front that we have to put up for watever reasons...
Coming Out From Within
I glare into the eyes that reaches deep into the soul, with a sense of emptiness as though
They carry a truth that can't be told, as others shun spiritual depthness ever so.
The world is filled with shallow praise, of fun and laughter with pretense.
I hope not that the end be near, if so, we'll all perish with fear.
I challenge self to be crystal clear, so that my compassion can pierce me to tears.
I desire to be the one full of love, so that i can conquer the world.
~* Sunday, December 25, 2005 *~
Church was great... Saw Ben dancing.. good job! then aaron acting, i laugh til i wanna cry.. so furnie! the paster was also super duper hilarious..... Too bad i didn't manage to ask any friends down...
Later on, it's daniel celebrate his birthday yesterday... we for a simple dinner with serene and ronald... at surf & turb.. when the waitress spill water all over my skirt... like it's all drenched! wat a way to start my day... totally ruin my day.. had to go toilet to try to blow dry under the dryer.. so unglam!
then later to countdown at marina mandarin hotel... when there were life performances.. great ambience and all... then had a glass of fine red wine.. then off home...
Today on Christmas morning.. i woke up to a pile of work waiting for me to finish... which i've procastinated doing since friday.... si bei sianz......
Now gotta finish up and go off to X'mas celebration at my Aunt's! Hopefully this time round i have a jolly good time! :)
Later on, it's daniel celebrate his birthday yesterday... we for a simple dinner with serene and ronald... at surf & turb.. when the waitress spill water all over my skirt... like it's all drenched! wat a way to start my day... totally ruin my day.. had to go toilet to try to blow dry under the dryer.. so unglam!
then later to countdown at marina mandarin hotel... when there were life performances.. great ambience and all... then had a glass of fine red wine.. then off home...
Today on Christmas morning.. i woke up to a pile of work waiting for me to finish... which i've procastinated doing since friday.... si bei sianz......
Now gotta finish up and go off to X'mas celebration at my Aunt's! Hopefully this time round i have a jolly good time! :)
Look at the Big Red Xmas Tree..
My stylo cowboy hat.. How di Ranger..
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Getting ready for countdown.. With Daniel the Birthday Boy!
Serene and Ronald... with their party hats..
~* Saturday, December 24, 2005 *~
I wanna wish all of ya a Merry X'mas... I guess X'mas isn't such a great time for me.. considering that i'm now doing my Stocktake report... it sucks.... and got other work to rush... cos as you all know next week is pretty short week so must bring home to do so that next week can finish the job...
But then again.. with the christmassy cheer up.. things ain't that bad.. at least i can rest more.. just not as much as i wanted to..... I wish you all a Jolly Good Time! Sorry if i don't drop you a pressie.. considering my poor state.. or don't send you a e-greeting card.... I just have no time!... not to mention meeting up with love ones to celebrate much...
I'm off to my X'mas service.. and later got a birthday celebration tonight... break at last.. then back home to do more work... :(
My wish this X'mas: That you all don't get bore down with work, problems, issues, money.. watsoever and just be merry! ;)
But then again.. with the christmassy cheer up.. things ain't that bad.. at least i can rest more.. just not as much as i wanted to..... I wish you all a Jolly Good Time! Sorry if i don't drop you a pressie.. considering my poor state.. or don't send you a e-greeting card.... I just have no time!... not to mention meeting up with love ones to celebrate much...
I'm off to my X'mas service.. and later got a birthday celebration tonight... break at last.. then back home to do more work... :(
My wish this X'mas: That you all don't get bore down with work, problems, issues, money.. watsoever and just be merry! ;)
~* Wednesday, December 21, 2005 *~
Just coming back from the holiday.. and i feel suffocated already. The trip didn't do me much justice... Too much going on for me to put it in one post. Just that now i really don't know how i should put it.. especially when being 'watched'... Be true to myself... i just need space to just get on with my own things...
These days are just moody... down... trying to get my engine started for work.. financial troubles and just doing lots of "me" time which i didn't have in a long long while....
Things are going to heat up in the next few days with a new job, x'mas coming up and next week new year with new year resolutions to plan...
Lots of things need to be done too... like work.. yes.. of cos... then like packing the stuff i bought.. I also still owe Ben his gift, sorry man... I'm guilty as charged! Gifts that I didn't buy for my friends when i came back.. luggage full and money restrained... it's another long long story... but I do love you all... but when travelling i sometimes think it's just to enjoy the trip.. so next time you're away.. Just don't bother abt me.. cos in S'pore.. you practically can get anything you want.. we're international!
With other "world saving" on my list which i haven't done... the "savior syndrome" they say... frankly now.. i hate some aspects of my life... with so much stuff in my hair..... around my neck.. I'm stifled and suffocating... next week on.. I'm totally packed, will be working late and all.. so don't need to ask me out..
P.S. Dearest Friends, let's not over-react... i'm fine.. just need an outlet to SCREAM!!!!!!!!!! and yes, i'm perfectly fine... and if i ever need to talk.. I will.. and trust me.. you might not wanna hear abt it ALL.....
These days are just moody... down... trying to get my engine started for work.. financial troubles and just doing lots of "me" time which i didn't have in a long long while....
Things are going to heat up in the next few days with a new job, x'mas coming up and next week new year with new year resolutions to plan...
Lots of things need to be done too... like work.. yes.. of cos... then like packing the stuff i bought.. I also still owe Ben his gift, sorry man... I'm guilty as charged! Gifts that I didn't buy for my friends when i came back.. luggage full and money restrained... it's another long long story... but I do love you all... but when travelling i sometimes think it's just to enjoy the trip.. so next time you're away.. Just don't bother abt me.. cos in S'pore.. you practically can get anything you want.. we're international!
With other "world saving" on my list which i haven't done... the "savior syndrome" they say... frankly now.. i hate some aspects of my life... with so much stuff in my hair..... around my neck.. I'm stifled and suffocating... next week on.. I'm totally packed, will be working late and all.. so don't need to ask me out..
P.S. Dearest Friends, let's not over-react... i'm fine.. just need an outlet to SCREAM!!!!!!!!!! and yes, i'm perfectly fine... and if i ever need to talk.. I will.. and trust me.. you might not wanna hear abt it ALL.....
~* Sunday, December 18, 2005 *~
I've been on holiday for abt 10 days to Hong Kong and China... The shopping was crazy... the food was yummy...
Along the way with some things gone wrong.. like how i placed the Daniel's Digicam in my bag and spoil the LCD screen..
Like how i can't tolerate the cold weather in China.. coldest was 6 degree celsius...
Overspent... deeply in debt... i wonder how i'm ever going to pay... I'm totally screwed til dunno when.. so if next time when you ask me out.. just go somewhere cheap k.. totally budget for now...
I think i've put on weight... couldn't be bothered really..
The trip is um.... i don't feel like talking about it.. gotta get to doing some thinking for now... get rest and yes go to work tomorrow..... recharged? I don't thnk so...... watever....
Along the way with some things gone wrong.. like how i placed the Daniel's Digicam in my bag and spoil the LCD screen..
Like how i can't tolerate the cold weather in China.. coldest was 6 degree celsius...
Overspent... deeply in debt... i wonder how i'm ever going to pay... I'm totally screwed til dunno when.. so if next time when you ask me out.. just go somewhere cheap k.. totally budget for now...
I think i've put on weight... couldn't be bothered really..
The trip is um.... i don't feel like talking about it.. gotta get to doing some thinking for now... get rest and yes go to work tomorrow..... recharged? I don't thnk so...... watever....
~* Friday, December 09, 2005 *~
Heya pple... I'm now going off to Hong Kong.. and Guangzhou, China... Things getting better I hope... anyway... u all take care and don't sms me or call me pls... over the next few days unless it is impt! will only be back on the 18th Dec.... Tata... Stay cute & funky til i get back yeah! ;)
~* Wednesday, December 07, 2005 *~
Looks something like this.. got all the x'mas figure.. the start got the bells, the others got the candy cane effect.. cool!
Sorry for the disorganized entries.. seems like after i install windowsblind on my lappy.. can't edit the timing of my entries..
it's really cool.. u can also download at http://skins.deviantart.com/
Check it out.. now mine is on a X'mas theme.. i've getting into the festive mood! :D
it's really cool.. u can also download at http://skins.deviantart.com/
Check it out.. now mine is on a X'mas theme.. i've getting into the festive mood! :D
Funny guy.. told us his Cab aunty wanted to marry him to get her PR in Aussie! Muahahaha...
Bryzie here to visit from Aussie!
Three is a nice number... my gfs.. finally meeting up.. A spontanous surprise! :D
It's about time i made an entry.. my internet is down.. i have no time on my job to blog.. yet i can't tell ya how much i have to express however... so many intimate details can't be revealed here... so those.. just gotta take it out eslewhere...
Like during last week when i finish get to meet up with my gal friends after such a long time.. well, we went to this pasta cafe at Taka... was a super last minute thing.. but i decided that it was important to meet up with them... i mean.. haven't really have a good talk or spend time with them for so long.. quality time.... catching up and updating one another abt the happenings in our lives...
Jiayi was radiant as ever... i'm so envious.. my skin condition seems to be deteriorating... and getting insights on how she handle managers and other irritating pple.. i think i need more practise.. i'm just so mellow now.. hate it...
I've got new pressies! Sweet jiayi bought me some gifts from Thailand... she've got taste man.. know wat i like.. will post it up another day.. this sexy top and big loop pink earrings.. must find the opportunity to wear it!
Then I became an overnight Econs tutor on Sat.. cos poor val had exams the next day so i went to dig out all my JC notes.. they're still ard ya know.. my treasures... but it wasn't too bad.. still remember my stuff.. she bought over pizza as well.. yummy!
Sunday was spent with church friends.. Serene and Ben bestest! we went shopping, have turkish food at far east, the kerbabs were good, would be going back soon.. then walk ard.. helping serene get things to match her dress for dnd.. mine is long over..
Then monday, Bryzie was visiting from Aussie! So Daniel and I went to meet up with him at Holland V for some beer.. haha... booze on monday night.. woah.. he's so farnie... telling us abt his Uni's "Nuddie Run".. where people run ard nude if the lose a bet.. it seems to be "in" overseas.. let's hope it doesn't catches on here..
I meet Christopher Lee at Holland V, and of all places.. at the toilet! haha.. he came out and i knew he was inside.. so i was all smiles at him but he is do shy.. just gave me a sheepish grin, wanna shake his hand to congratulate him for his award the other night, but seeing there wasn't any sink in the cubicle.. i decided to give it a pass... but yep, he's cute! :D
Work's great, friend's great! Holiday coming up this friday.. going to head to Hong Kong and Guangzhou til the 18th... just wish my mom would stop trying to plan the holiday for me... I just wanna do wat i wanna do! I've been telling her for the umpteeth time! Goodness... moms.. they are a nag sometimes...
Today had lunch with jiayi and peylin.. at subway.. it was good, our short but sweet hour of bitching.. giving "advices" and other bits of details.. haha... It's a good lunch... now refresh to do work.. but then... wat work? I'm on available time!! which means i'm free... hee hee... Tonight going for a party event at zouk.. Zoukie again.. heard there're drinks, games and ice-cream! Yeah!
Like during last week when i finish get to meet up with my gal friends after such a long time.. well, we went to this pasta cafe at Taka... was a super last minute thing.. but i decided that it was important to meet up with them... i mean.. haven't really have a good talk or spend time with them for so long.. quality time.... catching up and updating one another abt the happenings in our lives...
Jiayi was radiant as ever... i'm so envious.. my skin condition seems to be deteriorating... and getting insights on how she handle managers and other irritating pple.. i think i need more practise.. i'm just so mellow now.. hate it...
I've got new pressies! Sweet jiayi bought me some gifts from Thailand... she've got taste man.. know wat i like.. will post it up another day.. this sexy top and big loop pink earrings.. must find the opportunity to wear it!
Then I became an overnight Econs tutor on Sat.. cos poor val had exams the next day so i went to dig out all my JC notes.. they're still ard ya know.. my treasures... but it wasn't too bad.. still remember my stuff.. she bought over pizza as well.. yummy!
Sunday was spent with church friends.. Serene and Ben bestest! we went shopping, have turkish food at far east, the kerbabs were good, would be going back soon.. then walk ard.. helping serene get things to match her dress for dnd.. mine is long over..
Then monday, Bryzie was visiting from Aussie! So Daniel and I went to meet up with him at Holland V for some beer.. haha... booze on monday night.. woah.. he's so farnie... telling us abt his Uni's "Nuddie Run".. where people run ard nude if the lose a bet.. it seems to be "in" overseas.. let's hope it doesn't catches on here..
I meet Christopher Lee at Holland V, and of all places.. at the toilet! haha.. he came out and i knew he was inside.. so i was all smiles at him but he is do shy.. just gave me a sheepish grin, wanna shake his hand to congratulate him for his award the other night, but seeing there wasn't any sink in the cubicle.. i decided to give it a pass... but yep, he's cute! :D
Work's great, friend's great! Holiday coming up this friday.. going to head to Hong Kong and Guangzhou til the 18th... just wish my mom would stop trying to plan the holiday for me... I just wanna do wat i wanna do! I've been telling her for the umpteeth time! Goodness... moms.. they are a nag sometimes...
Today had lunch with jiayi and peylin.. at subway.. it was good, our short but sweet hour of bitching.. giving "advices" and other bits of details.. haha... It's a good lunch... now refresh to do work.. but then... wat work? I'm on available time!! which means i'm free... hee hee... Tonight going for a party event at zouk.. Zoukie again.. heard there're drinks, games and ice-cream! Yeah!
Faith dearest... a toast?... or just a pose? okie i'm being crappy....
Trying to make a face.. not very successful.. just look like i've swollen lips.. haha...
