Simple Thoughts.... Complex Thinking..... In Search For An Answer
~* Sunday, February 26, 2006 *~
Pls help me to know myself better it'll take you less than a minute! Pls do me a favour.. and click away!
http://kevan.org/johari?name=MaddyWan
Thanks all! I'm sure this will help me know what i'm really like! :D
off to baker's innz for apple strudel... look at the thick fluffy layers... mama mia!
just talking rubbish and laughing at ourselves... with Ben Bestest and Pretty gal serene...
I'm at the Esplanade.. roof terrace.. a good place to go seat down.. and enjoy the view of S'pore..
Taken at Esplanade last week.. some art decor... nice...
It's Mel's Birthday... with her surprise birthday cake from Ah Boy..
Trying hard to look cool...
Um.. wat i can say is lee looks retarded.. haha...
~* Saturday, February 25, 2006 *~
Words From Stillness
Blogged down with work... out of the world mistakes made... sometimes wonder is it just me or all my friends are going through the same things?
When it's only a few days but you felt like you've been at it for years.. doing the same stuff over and over... making an effort to get it right when it comes crashing down on you...
Trying at best to give a decent reply when all the other side hears is incompetence... ignorance.. heck care.. just do for the sake of doing attitude which you don't recognize as yours...
Working thru' the night to finish your part.. due to delay of information from client... eating away at off work time... which no one notices...
Wonder why one simple application take ages to complete.. to get thru' and finally getting thru when the person is on leave......
At another gathering.. people say one thing but do another... acceptance is key but discuss on ways to change you.. love is unconditional when bad experiences has taught you otherwise.. when poking and nosing abt other life is abt accountability and closeness means everyone esle knows abt your private life.. contemplates whats happens and comes back like they know you better than you know yourself...
I want a simple life... but life is no longer simple...
I want to have true friends.. but it's hard to tell them apart...
I want to serve God.. but you must be willing to pay the price...
I want... when it's no longer about me...
My selfishness... verses Selflessness...
Things just ain't wat it seems.........................................................................................
The day my life came to a standstill.........................................................................................................
When it's only a few days but you felt like you've been at it for years.. doing the same stuff over and over... making an effort to get it right when it comes crashing down on you...
Trying at best to give a decent reply when all the other side hears is incompetence... ignorance.. heck care.. just do for the sake of doing attitude which you don't recognize as yours...
Working thru' the night to finish your part.. due to delay of information from client... eating away at off work time... which no one notices...
Wonder why one simple application take ages to complete.. to get thru' and finally getting thru when the person is on leave......
At another gathering.. people say one thing but do another... acceptance is key but discuss on ways to change you.. love is unconditional when bad experiences has taught you otherwise.. when poking and nosing abt other life is abt accountability and closeness means everyone esle knows abt your private life.. contemplates whats happens and comes back like they know you better than you know yourself...
I want a simple life... but life is no longer simple...
I want to have true friends.. but it's hard to tell them apart...
I want to serve God.. but you must be willing to pay the price...
I want... when it's no longer about me...
My selfishness... verses Selflessness...
Things just ain't wat it seems.........................................................................................
The day my life came to a standstill.........................................................................................................
~* Friday, February 24, 2006 *~
"When will you be home?" she asks
as we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
and yet she says to me
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
Autumn leaves fell into spring time and
Silver paint her hair
Daddy called one evening saying"We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
ohh...I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
as we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
and yet she says to me
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
Autumn leaves fell into spring time and
Silver paint her hair
Daddy called one evening saying"We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried
You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
ohh...I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
~* Tuesday, February 21, 2006 *~
Tree Top Walk.. the start.. and i'll still dry... 
I'm ready for the road march.. let's go!
Look Tree top Walk...
Long long walk ahead...
Drenched!
Beware!.. there is no turning back.. One way street...
&#@*!^%#!! I'm afraid of heights!!
~* Sunday, February 19, 2006 *~
That exactly what i did... I went for the Tree-top walk just last saturday.. i walked from SICC (Bukit) though.. the wrong one.. the SICC (Upper Thomson) was suppose to be the nearer one.. so it turns out that i had to walk abt 8km i think.
Well, i went in my comfy steady track shoes.. shorts and singlet to combat the heat.. brought my tumbler filled with sunkist orange juice.. a pack of nuts to much along the way.. but we had to leave our umbrella behind. Figured that the bright sunny weather wouldn't bring in any rain..
Along the way.. dark clouds hover aroud us.. a short drizzle, but since we are half way.. we push on.. finally reaching the tree top walk.. it was lovely just that b4 agreeing to go.. i forgot abt my fear of heights!! Yikes.. and the best deal of it all.. when we got to the middle.. it started to pour... Worst deal ever!
I was thoroughly soaked through.. every single inch of skin, my shoes, my hair... well, it's fun i must say to walk in the rain.. for over an hour.. I did do a little dance, it's a rare experience.. i miss the rain.. and the dancng in the rain..
While it lasted, it really made my day.. I enjoyed the wonderful company, the rain.. the insects that go beep in the night.. the short burst of sunlight.. the crickets.. the funny stares.. to be in nature once again..
Let's hope we can all still dance.. when it is raining... when our lifes are in its ups and downs.. when it really pours.. and that.. we will appreciate the sun even more!
There are shortcuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them. - Vicki Baum
Well, i went in my comfy steady track shoes.. shorts and singlet to combat the heat.. brought my tumbler filled with sunkist orange juice.. a pack of nuts to much along the way.. but we had to leave our umbrella behind. Figured that the bright sunny weather wouldn't bring in any rain..
Along the way.. dark clouds hover aroud us.. a short drizzle, but since we are half way.. we push on.. finally reaching the tree top walk.. it was lovely just that b4 agreeing to go.. i forgot abt my fear of heights!! Yikes.. and the best deal of it all.. when we got to the middle.. it started to pour... Worst deal ever!
I was thoroughly soaked through.. every single inch of skin, my shoes, my hair... well, it's fun i must say to walk in the rain.. for over an hour.. I did do a little dance, it's a rare experience.. i miss the rain.. and the dancng in the rain..
While it lasted, it really made my day.. I enjoyed the wonderful company, the rain.. the insects that go beep in the night.. the short burst of sunlight.. the crickets.. the funny stares.. to be in nature once again..
Let's hope we can all still dance.. when it is raining... when our lifes are in its ups and downs.. when it really pours.. and that.. we will appreciate the sun even more!
There are shortcuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them. - Vicki Baum
~* Wednesday, February 15, 2006 *~
It's valentine's day yesterday.. did started as well as i expected, with the postponing of dinner, making last minute movie ticket bookings.. so-so expensive food cum boring movie.. pple don't watch "Walk the Line".. ain't wat it seems...
The night ended quite nicely with the exchange of cheesy V. Day gifts... a good long talk and.. yes pple... i gave my answer.. i guess i updated most of ya on a need to know basis.. and of cos those i want to know... i don't like broadcasting my private love life here... so.. that's all folks! Hope you all had a lovely time yesterday!! Happy V Day if you didn't hear from me already...
With Love,
XOXO
Maddy
The night ended quite nicely with the exchange of cheesy V. Day gifts... a good long talk and.. yes pple... i gave my answer.. i guess i updated most of ya on a need to know basis.. and of cos those i want to know... i don't like broadcasting my private love life here... so.. that's all folks! Hope you all had a lovely time yesterday!! Happy V Day if you didn't hear from me already...
With Love,
XOXO
Maddy
~* Sunday, February 12, 2006 *~
It's Cheryl's birthday last night.. it's was just a cosy get together.. with drinks and games... however they decided to go partying at MOS... I didn't wanna go intinially... however i guess it's her birthday so.. didn't wanna disappoint her.. and Boon offered to pay for me first... so.. heck it!
While waiting outside for boon, there was this guy.. gay i hope.. walking ard in his black G-string!! hanging outside of his white pants.. which did do much covering up either.. wat's up with that man!? Yikes.... just to give you all a better idea.. my description don't do justice.. "pls refer to work down below".. "suggest leave" (*accounting lingo)
But i guess i'm kinda over clubbing.. it was kind of tiring and i'm not a drinker anymore.. puke the other day when i drank just a glass of beer at an resturant opening event... today was paying off my sleep debt... slept til 5pm today.. was totally exhausted.. you see.. that's why i need my pampering session...
I feel myself getting more and more depressed by my job recently.. can't really put a finger on it.. is it time for a job switch for me as well? Haiz..... I can't decide...
While waiting outside for boon, there was this guy.. gay i hope.. walking ard in his black G-string!! hanging outside of his white pants.. which did do much covering up either.. wat's up with that man!? Yikes.... just to give you all a better idea.. my description don't do justice.. "pls refer to work down below".. "suggest leave" (*accounting lingo)
But i guess i'm kinda over clubbing.. it was kind of tiring and i'm not a drinker anymore.. puke the other day when i drank just a glass of beer at an resturant opening event... today was paying off my sleep debt... slept til 5pm today.. was totally exhausted.. you see.. that's why i need my pampering session...
I feel myself getting more and more depressed by my job recently.. can't really put a finger on it.. is it time for a job switch for me as well? Haiz..... I can't decide...
The lights, smoke and crowd... behind the waterfall screen..Cool isn't it?
This is Chris.. MTV host cum civil engineer.. still wondering which one is true.. icing his head with his vodka.. haha
I was waiting outside MOS when.. i grasped and saw...
Gross.. Point noted!
That's referring to my bank a/c... I think I'm officially B.R.O.K.E... Bank Balance has been going down down down.. wonder if i can make it to my pay day... die..... I need a sugar daddy or something... or some kind soul who will offer to pay for me..
All thanks to my love for beauty, food, relaxation... the perception of tai tai dom... and impulse decision making.. someone should just take my atm card away from me... won't work now that it's empty... when Credit > Debits = SQUAT!!!!!!!!!!
I'm enough depressed already.. pls pls pls.. don't attempt to give me another lecture.. i guess i've learnt my lesson... i just need someone who at least relate to my current situation... and give me a kind listening ear......
All thanks to my love for beauty, food, relaxation... the perception of tai tai dom... and impulse decision making.. someone should just take my atm card away from me... won't work now that it's empty... when Credit > Debits = SQUAT!!!!!!!!!!
I'm enough depressed already.. pls pls pls.. don't attempt to give me another lecture.. i guess i've learnt my lesson... i just need someone who at least relate to my current situation... and give me a kind listening ear......
~* Saturday, February 11, 2006 *~
1.What time is it: 3:09am (Singapore)
2. What is your Full Name?: Maddy Wan.. well, this is a blog.. don't wanna anyhow give out info
3. Nicknames: Dah.. Maddy... My dad calls me "Xiao Bao"..
4. Piercing: I've got 6 ear holes, some closed up... now only use 2 of them..
5. Pets: A pomeranian... name "Wolfy"
6. What color pants are you wearing right now?: In my Pyjamas... it's blue with farm cartoons on it..
7. What are you listening to right now? Watching the opening of the Olympics Winter Games 2006, Torino... Live!..
8. What are the last 2 digits of your phone number? 86
9. What was the last thing you ate: Was at Mr. Bean opp Parklane for Seafood Soup & Fried Chicken Wings.. Yummy!
10.If you were a crayon what color would you be: Pink! Girlie and Bright!
11. How is the weather right now? Clear Quiet night
12. Last person you talked to on the phone? My mama... She is the Bestest!
13. First thing you notice about whichever sex you're attracted to? I'm straight... um.. Eyes... they're the windows to your soul..
14. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Didn't actually receive this.. stole it from Brandon's blog.. Nice guy!
15. How are you today? Um.. not too good.. depressed with my job, tired.. need to complain, whine.. have time to myself... to find out my true calling for God's purpose... I feel like the things i'm doing are basically meaningless.. other than the blah blah blah.. learning, good for career.. sort of things... so do you really wanna know how i'm doing?! Don't make me start.. just don't ask...
16. Favorite Drink: Green tea... recently cafe latte...
17. Favorite Alcoholic drink? Lychee martini
18. Favorite Sports to participate in? Horseriding... i miss it...
19. Hair Color: Nature dark black... now i dye it brown...
20. Eye Color: brown
21. Do you wear contacts: Nope
22. Siblings:1 older brother
23. Favorite Month(s): December.. the festive season..
24. Favorite Food? Chocolates.. Gelato from sixth avenue.. Desserts from baker's innz, stuff with loads of cheese..
25. The movie you watched last ? Harry Potter... Globet of Fire...
26. Favorite Day of the Year: not any one in particular.. something special have to happen.... if not even your birthday might suck...
27. Are you too shy to ask someone out? Definitely not...
28. Summer or Winter? Summer.. i can't take the really cold weather...
29. Hugs or Kisses? A hug follow by a soft kiss.. not too wet.. not too much tougue..
30. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate!!
31. What books are you reading: A Purpose Driven Life
32. Whats on your mouse pad? Angelina Jolie.. Tomb Raider
33. Favorite Board Game(s)? Monopoly! Brings back those childhood memories
34. What did you do last night? last night was up working til nearly midnight.. only reach home at midnight.. I'm becoming a modern day cinderella..
35. Living Arrangements: Still staying with my folks
36. Favorite Smells: The ocean breeze... wolfy freshly from taking his bath... my hair after it's washed... my one and only pleasure perfume from estee lauder
37. Least Favorite Smells? anything smelly...
38. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: I can try...
39. What inspires you? The Greatness, Complexity, Perfection in God...
40. Favorite Word? Yoz...
41. Favorite place to eat out? Baker's Innz
42.What was your most perfect vacation escape? Haven't found one yet... but i guess not so much the place but the company you're with...
43. If you won the lottery would you continue to work? Of cos... how can you not work? at least gotta work on how i'm going to multiply it.. and later enjoy it.. and can't forget abt giving my bit to society...
44. Favorite snack: Chocolates!
45. Favorite candy: Does mint count?
46. Favorite Flower? This one is classic... the rose....
47. The first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Do i really have to wake up? how many times can i snooze? Is it the time to force myself up.. i'm not a morning person...
48. Favorite fast food restaurant: Mos Burger.. great fries and I love their beef rice burger..
49. Favorite day of the week: Saturday... can wake up late.. and sleep late.. and where almost everyone gets off work by the time i get up..
50. Favorite ice cream: Sixth Avenue Tartufo...
51. What is your favorite color? Pink and white...
52. Lake, ocean or river? The Clear Blue Ocean.. like the ones i saw in australia... along the great ocean road...
53. How many tattoos do you have? None.. i don't like any marks on my body that are not God given... God made us the way we should be..
54. Prefer your lady in cotton panties or a gstring? I've no lad... but i like those lace boxers... really comfy!
55. Birthday: 08 Mar 1982
56. Are you currently dating anyone? Yeah.. Always...
57. What is your opinion of things like this? Guyz... can't live with them.. can't live without them..
58. Favorite CD of 2005: Corrine May.. Super Hero Girl..
59. ever been toilet papering? Wat's that? if you mean sticking damp toilet paper on the ceiling.. never tried it before.. it's so inconsiderate..
60. Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yeah.. many times.. still do...
61. Been in a car accident? Nope... I'm accident free...
62. Croutons or bacon bits? Croutons! They're Crunchy!!
63. Disney or Warner Bros: Warner Bros... feels more trendy...
64. How many times did you fail your drivers test? 2 times.. passed on 3 attempt.. who cares.. as long as i pass... I can still drive great!
65. From whom did you get your last e-mail? From Cheryl... some party thingy!! Woo Hooo!!!
66. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? For platinum card.. Sime Darby... for BMWs...
67. What you do most often when you are bored? anything under the sun... always able to keep myself fully entertained...
68. Bedtime? whenever i need it or feel like it..
69. Favorite TV shows: Friends! so heartwarming and it's hilarious...
70. Last person you went out to dinner with? With my Church friends...
71. Ford or Chevy? BMW or Merc? The BMW.. Z4....
72. Your best memory? Too personal to blog... it's a sweet sweet time i hold close in my heart...
73. Time you finished this e-mail? 4am...
74. Do you want your friends to write back? Yes pls...
75. Who is most likely to respond: Sunflower or Cranberrymist
76: Who is least likely to respond: Daniel.. he probably thinks this is a waste of time.. right? :P
* From Brandon's bloggy...
2. What is your Full Name?: Maddy Wan.. well, this is a blog.. don't wanna anyhow give out info
3. Nicknames: Dah.. Maddy... My dad calls me "Xiao Bao"..
4. Piercing: I've got 6 ear holes, some closed up... now only use 2 of them..
5. Pets: A pomeranian... name "Wolfy"
6. What color pants are you wearing right now?: In my Pyjamas... it's blue with farm cartoons on it..
7. What are you listening to right now? Watching the opening of the Olympics Winter Games 2006, Torino... Live!..
8. What are the last 2 digits of your phone number? 86
9. What was the last thing you ate: Was at Mr. Bean opp Parklane for Seafood Soup & Fried Chicken Wings.. Yummy!
10.If you were a crayon what color would you be: Pink! Girlie and Bright!
11. How is the weather right now? Clear Quiet night
12. Last person you talked to on the phone? My mama... She is the Bestest!
13. First thing you notice about whichever sex you're attracted to? I'm straight... um.. Eyes... they're the windows to your soul..
14. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Didn't actually receive this.. stole it from Brandon's blog.. Nice guy!
15. How are you today? Um.. not too good.. depressed with my job, tired.. need to complain, whine.. have time to myself... to find out my true calling for God's purpose... I feel like the things i'm doing are basically meaningless.. other than the blah blah blah.. learning, good for career.. sort of things... so do you really wanna know how i'm doing?! Don't make me start.. just don't ask...
16. Favorite Drink: Green tea... recently cafe latte...
17. Favorite Alcoholic drink? Lychee martini
18. Favorite Sports to participate in? Horseriding... i miss it...
19. Hair Color: Nature dark black... now i dye it brown...
20. Eye Color: brown
21. Do you wear contacts: Nope
22. Siblings:1 older brother
23. Favorite Month(s): December.. the festive season..
24. Favorite Food? Chocolates.. Gelato from sixth avenue.. Desserts from baker's innz, stuff with loads of cheese..
25. The movie you watched last ? Harry Potter... Globet of Fire...
26. Favorite Day of the Year: not any one in particular.. something special have to happen.... if not even your birthday might suck...
27. Are you too shy to ask someone out? Definitely not...
28. Summer or Winter? Summer.. i can't take the really cold weather...
29. Hugs or Kisses? A hug follow by a soft kiss.. not too wet.. not too much tougue..
30. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate!!
31. What books are you reading: A Purpose Driven Life
32. Whats on your mouse pad? Angelina Jolie.. Tomb Raider
33. Favorite Board Game(s)? Monopoly! Brings back those childhood memories
34. What did you do last night? last night was up working til nearly midnight.. only reach home at midnight.. I'm becoming a modern day cinderella..
35. Living Arrangements: Still staying with my folks
36. Favorite Smells: The ocean breeze... wolfy freshly from taking his bath... my hair after it's washed... my one and only pleasure perfume from estee lauder
37. Least Favorite Smells? anything smelly...
38. Can you touch your nose with your tongue: I can try...
39. What inspires you? The Greatness, Complexity, Perfection in God...
40. Favorite Word? Yoz...
41. Favorite place to eat out? Baker's Innz
42.What was your most perfect vacation escape? Haven't found one yet... but i guess not so much the place but the company you're with...
43. If you won the lottery would you continue to work? Of cos... how can you not work? at least gotta work on how i'm going to multiply it.. and later enjoy it.. and can't forget abt giving my bit to society...
44. Favorite snack: Chocolates!
45. Favorite candy: Does mint count?
46. Favorite Flower? This one is classic... the rose....
47. The first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Do i really have to wake up? how many times can i snooze? Is it the time to force myself up.. i'm not a morning person...
48. Favorite fast food restaurant: Mos Burger.. great fries and I love their beef rice burger..
49. Favorite day of the week: Saturday... can wake up late.. and sleep late.. and where almost everyone gets off work by the time i get up..
50. Favorite ice cream: Sixth Avenue Tartufo...
51. What is your favorite color? Pink and white...
52. Lake, ocean or river? The Clear Blue Ocean.. like the ones i saw in australia... along the great ocean road...
53. How many tattoos do you have? None.. i don't like any marks on my body that are not God given... God made us the way we should be..
54. Prefer your lady in cotton panties or a gstring? I've no lad... but i like those lace boxers... really comfy!
55. Birthday: 08 Mar 1982
56. Are you currently dating anyone? Yeah.. Always...
57. What is your opinion of things like this? Guyz... can't live with them.. can't live without them..
58. Favorite CD of 2005: Corrine May.. Super Hero Girl..
59. ever been toilet papering? Wat's that? if you mean sticking damp toilet paper on the ceiling.. never tried it before.. it's so inconsiderate..
60. Loved someone so much it made you cry? Yeah.. many times.. still do...
61. Been in a car accident? Nope... I'm accident free...
62. Croutons or bacon bits? Croutons! They're Crunchy!!
63. Disney or Warner Bros: Warner Bros... feels more trendy...
64. How many times did you fail your drivers test? 2 times.. passed on 3 attempt.. who cares.. as long as i pass... I can still drive great!
65. From whom did you get your last e-mail? From Cheryl... some party thingy!! Woo Hooo!!!
66. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? For platinum card.. Sime Darby... for BMWs...
67. What you do most often when you are bored? anything under the sun... always able to keep myself fully entertained...
68. Bedtime? whenever i need it or feel like it..
69. Favorite TV shows: Friends! so heartwarming and it's hilarious...
70. Last person you went out to dinner with? With my Church friends...
71. Ford or Chevy? BMW or Merc? The BMW.. Z4....
72. Your best memory? Too personal to blog... it's a sweet sweet time i hold close in my heart...
73. Time you finished this e-mail? 4am...
74. Do you want your friends to write back? Yes pls...
75. Who is most likely to respond: Sunflower or Cranberrymist
76: Who is least likely to respond: Daniel.. he probably thinks this is a waste of time.. right? :P
* From Brandon's bloggy...
~* Tuesday, February 07, 2006 *~
Work has been terribly busy since monday... rushing stuff.. multi-tasking work between several companies that i lost track of wat left to do and wat i've already done.. where time flies bewtten 9-5pm.. nights spent working late that when you actually get to go home.. you feel like your day just begin..
The part where you actually get to do wat you want to do.. watever it may be.. for me it's just having a nice dinner cum supper.. catching up with friends and family if any still out and awake... reaching home to just lay back for that much forgotten comedy sitcom you used to watch during your schooling days.. to put on a facial mask to try to regain the glow from the worn out day...
A little a day is all we really need to recover but at times that can be so hard to actually achieve.. like me and some of my friends who work to near midnight, spend half an hours on the phone trying to get a cab... making it to some shop for that last order of food.. arriving home to that warm much needed shower... yet consistently but reluctantly continual thots of work you've left behind..
Little by little, these thots form into paranoid.. manifessing into nightmares.. no actual peace or relaxed moment of workless rest.. until it's the weekend which flies by ever so quickly...
The idea of how friends may shun you when you can't make it for gatherings.. who don't understand why you have to stay at home on weekends just to do nothing... of not replying missed smses or calls.. when nobody askes you out cos your schedule for the week is (after normal working hours)
Mon Work
Tues Work
Wed Work
Thurs Work
Fri Warp up/pull out
when friday where everyone esle meets up for gatherings, chill out.. to head down to some hip club... you arrive at the office dragging back those thick brown files.. to make a copy of work done on your company's server.. at the time when everyone esles leaves to go home...
I may be exaggerating but this is very much what i can picture in my head in the next few years to come.. depressing... but you know.. a little a day.. builds up to a whole bit.. then a chunk of how your life is just written off..
The part where you actually get to do wat you want to do.. watever it may be.. for me it's just having a nice dinner cum supper.. catching up with friends and family if any still out and awake... reaching home to just lay back for that much forgotten comedy sitcom you used to watch during your schooling days.. to put on a facial mask to try to regain the glow from the worn out day...
A little a day is all we really need to recover but at times that can be so hard to actually achieve.. like me and some of my friends who work to near midnight, spend half an hours on the phone trying to get a cab... making it to some shop for that last order of food.. arriving home to that warm much needed shower... yet consistently but reluctantly continual thots of work you've left behind..
Little by little, these thots form into paranoid.. manifessing into nightmares.. no actual peace or relaxed moment of workless rest.. until it's the weekend which flies by ever so quickly...
The idea of how friends may shun you when you can't make it for gatherings.. who don't understand why you have to stay at home on weekends just to do nothing... of not replying missed smses or calls.. when nobody askes you out cos your schedule for the week is (after normal working hours)
Mon Work
Tues Work
Wed Work
Thurs Work
Fri Warp up/pull out
when friday where everyone esle meets up for gatherings, chill out.. to head down to some hip club... you arrive at the office dragging back those thick brown files.. to make a copy of work done on your company's server.. at the time when everyone esles leaves to go home...
I may be exaggerating but this is very much what i can picture in my head in the next few years to come.. depressing... but you know.. a little a day.. builds up to a whole bit.. then a chunk of how your life is just written off..
~* Saturday, February 04, 2006 *~
Checkout my bro and his gf.. compatible or not?
My Big Family!! Dad's side.. with lots of grand children..
At God mama place to Bai Nan..
Little Cousin James bathing.. Uncle Simon say he wanted to test the camera..he sure did!
CNY chillies?! Um....
Reunion dinner at my Uncle Simon's place.. My fav food cooked by Auntie.. she's a chef i tell ya.. Full of amazing food ideas my mom always say...
A Big Helping of Loi Hei at Crystal Jade.. Sumsptious isn't it? ;)
Loi Hei with my IMC Team!! Loi Arh!!
Today has amazingly turn today... the clouds are starting to clear... the sun is starting to rise but then it's not all bright and sunny just as yet.. but it's definitely better than rainy....
Today my CG, some new friends like Brandon.. and even my old pal Jeffrey and his gf turned up for steamboat reunion gathering at my place.. but quite disappointing when cheryl and boon cancelled on me at the last minute... but nvm... i still had a good time!
Went to work today to realized that i was book for an extra week on the same job, so phew! More time to do what i can't finish.. then meet Faith for a while when i went off to buy my fav yogurt at Swenson, then later when i finally had a chance to leave work only at abt 7pm, i called serene to find her at suntec taxi stand, so i manage to hitch a ride in time to reach home in time.. not too late.. plus that sweet gal offered to pay.. so i'll be buying her a treat next time..
Back home things are all going smoothly tonight.. off to hve supper at beauty world but only managed a teh tarik.. then to Mustafa to buy stuff... but on the way home.. got his irritating Van keep hogging us cutting into our lane.. then tailgating us from the back, honking at us.. Goodness.. the uncle driving is such a road menance!! Urgh!!
so God has been listening in.. answering m prayers.. Praise God! Now Gade is at the agent, pls pray that we are able to claim insurance from the other party... if not next time insurance will go up.. :(
Just uploaded the pics from CNY.. so here are some of my family and close ones!! :D
Today my CG, some new friends like Brandon.. and even my old pal Jeffrey and his gf turned up for steamboat reunion gathering at my place.. but quite disappointing when cheryl and boon cancelled on me at the last minute... but nvm... i still had a good time!
Went to work today to realized that i was book for an extra week on the same job, so phew! More time to do what i can't finish.. then meet Faith for a while when i went off to buy my fav yogurt at Swenson, then later when i finally had a chance to leave work only at abt 7pm, i called serene to find her at suntec taxi stand, so i manage to hitch a ride in time to reach home in time.. not too late.. plus that sweet gal offered to pay.. so i'll be buying her a treat next time..
Back home things are all going smoothly tonight.. off to hve supper at beauty world but only managed a teh tarik.. then to Mustafa to buy stuff... but on the way home.. got his irritating Van keep hogging us cutting into our lane.. then tailgating us from the back, honking at us.. Goodness.. the uncle driving is such a road menance!! Urgh!!
so God has been listening in.. answering m prayers.. Praise God! Now Gade is at the agent, pls pray that we are able to claim insurance from the other party... if not next time insurance will go up.. :(
Just uploaded the pics from CNY.. so here are some of my family and close ones!! :D
~* Thursday, February 02, 2006 *~
Things have been going on a down hill for me eversince Chu 1.. here goes:
First day of CNY.. lost money at some causal gambling rounds.. i didn't think anything of it til now actually... then come day
Day 2.... Food poisoning... vomiting cum diahorrea... I even missed out on the CNY gathering with the Gang, thot i could join in the late night food munching, gambling, just making lots of ridiculous jokes and all... I act stuck up not wanting to go.. but i actually really missed not being able to go......
Day 3.... Barely eating right... sleeping and resting... still weak, tired and sick all day long... cooped up at home... hoping to recover quickly for work.. got wierd call last night.. woke up at 4am from a nightmare...
Day 4... Back to work... with queasy stomach.. feverish... and headache.. feelin' surreal all day.. faint.. barely making it til 5pm... cruz having bf problems.. confiding in me on the phone at work.. but dunno wat advice to give also...
I have decided that i've done my part for the day... throw in the towel... cannot make it already.. I did my part making it to work despite feeling better in the morning.. i told the A2 i'm helping that i cannot make it liaoz... need to make a move... but no compassion shown.. only a black cloudy face... ask this & that.. she usually quite nice one.. sudden change of attitude out of no where...I mean i'm trying my best ain't I! My mood then was in a topsy turby... should i be sad, revengeful, angry, or just guilt... it's my own downfall for not being able to finish my work.... seems to be all rolled into one horrible ball aimed at me....my brain already not working...
First day of CNY.. lost money at some causal gambling rounds.. i didn't think anything of it til now actually... then come day
Day 2.... Food poisoning... vomiting cum diahorrea... I even missed out on the CNY gathering with the Gang, thot i could join in the late night food munching, gambling, just making lots of ridiculous jokes and all... I act stuck up not wanting to go.. but i actually really missed not being able to go......
Day 3.... Barely eating right... sleeping and resting... still weak, tired and sick all day long... cooped up at home... hoping to recover quickly for work.. got wierd call last night.. woke up at 4am from a nightmare...
Day 4... Back to work... with queasy stomach.. feverish... and headache.. feelin' surreal all day.. faint.. barely making it til 5pm... cruz having bf problems.. confiding in me on the phone at work.. but dunno wat advice to give also...
I have decided that i've done my part for the day... throw in the towel... cannot make it already.. I did my part making it to work despite feeling better in the morning.. i told the A2 i'm helping that i cannot make it liaoz... need to make a move... but no compassion shown.. only a black cloudy face... ask this & that.. she usually quite nice one.. sudden change of attitude out of no where...I mean i'm trying my best ain't I! My mood then was in a topsy turby... should i be sad, revengeful, angry, or just guilt... it's my own downfall for not being able to finish my work.... seems to be all rolled into one horrible ball aimed at me....my brain already not working...
More coaching notes from a super detailed managers for sections i'm doing for the first time!! Wat a way to learn.... then everybody is busy yet i've so many questions.. really green ones... wat did ya expect... it's my first time doing it!! Yet i have to appear intelligent.. when i speak to client who just push me here and there.. cos nobody knows what i'm asking abt.. cos there are so many inter companies!!!!!! urgh!!!! If only sunflower and cranberrymist with me... they won't shun me for asking qns...I miss you gals....
Anyways, went down to the Doc, certified down with gastric flu... then heard that Cheryl's and Stan's R & B Event is cancelled... I was really sorry to hear abt that... so no more partying... and with 1 day MC.. that means i've gotta work later this week.. and friday got CG steamboat dinner at my place... sure work late lor! How?!?!?!?
Reach home to find out from Dad that Mom got into a minor accident... The stupid gal driver speeding, knock my mom while she was turning out of the carpark into the right lane.. I thank God that Mom is alright, not a scratch on her.. however, Gade isn't as perfect as he should be anymore... He got crashed in the left rear tyre and door... that means we've got to fixed both the back door body+door+rim+maybe even suspension! Woah!!!! And inspite of resting tomorrow.. looks like i've gotta accompany mom down to make a police report and get the car repairs done.... Plus i'm still up doing documentation for the work which i've just manage to get info on for today!!! So much for being on MC... which is for medical care = Rest.. and i ain't getting any...
I just feel the fire burning up my ass..... I'm entirely overwhelm with all these happenings.... lucky got some sweet someone in my life... made me home made cod fish porridge on Tues.. brought it to me from home... fetch me to and from work.. bring to the doctor today.. greeted me with yet another tumbler of home made pork cum dried scallop porridge... Awwww... sincerity + effort.. ++++ extra brownie points!!
So friends.. pls hold me in your prayers that i get well soon, that the car claims goes smoothly.. that i able to finish my work in time.. to make it home on friday for dinner.. and that I can lighten up... I feel so whiny and depress now... :(
